Look Good, Feel Good, Be Good

Style is not just about fashion or interior design. The whole point of style—looking at it, talking about it, cultivating it, aspiring toward it—is to feel good.

You may have noticed that I have a new photo up this week. Last time I had a professional photo taken, I didn’t feel great. Standing in front of a camera doesn’t come naturally to me and I didn’t prepare myself appropriately for that discomfort. Instead of taking care to surround myself with the things that would help me feel calm and confident, I went with denial, faux-nonchalance and finally, inevitably, a little bit of panic. The results were photos that, although presentable, just weren’t me. Nothing stylish about that.

This time around, I did it differently. A good photographer helps--I used Ken Larson of Waterfront Creative. He keeps it casual and comfortable so it's easier to be yourself. I also thought about the things (clothes, music, ambience, even beverages—caffeinated, not alcoholic, of course) which would help me feel great, and thus bring out the best in me. They are the things I have learned to rely on for those moments in life when I can use a little extra confidence: preparing for an important meeting, recovering after a long and stressful day, and of course, smiling for the cameras. The difference is in confidence and relaxation, two things that style can and should help to bring you.

See a slideshow of my entire photo shoot here: http://www.kodakgallery.com/Slideshow.jsp?Uc=bugqdfv.95bche3v&Uy=-551fl1&Upost_signin=Slideshow.jsp%3Fmode%3Dfromshare&Ux=0&UV=665955065731_307809483307&mode=fromshare&conn_speed=1

This week I thought I would ask my most stylish friends what elements of style help them feel most confident. Here’s what they said:

Chrissy Bovo
ROIHS Principal and Creative Director, my business partner and lifelong style mentor
“Anything crisp, clean and white. Like my Michael Kors white linen jacket.”

Jenna Pachucki
New Yorker, Museum Historian, had the "Katie Holmes bob" before Katie Holmes did
“Wearing my grandmother’s jewelry. It’s different and fun and unique to me. It connects me to her—just knowing how thrilled she’d be that I’m wearing it gives me an inner sense of confidence.”

Stephen Goularte
Nightclub Impresario, Man about town, Owner of EOS in Santa Barbara
“Something over the top. Maybe an ascot. Maybe a puff collar. Maybe an all-white suit. Something that will 'bling it to the table'. ”

Mimi Marinchak
ROIHS Decorator, Fabulous mom of three, purveyor of preppy style
“Fresh flowers {tulips, hydrangeas, orchids} and scented candles {Diptyque, Votivo, and even Pottery Barn and Target}”.

Kristin Burk (on left)
Restaurant Biz Wiz, my best friend, luxury label lover
“Hair is important. If my hair looks good, I feel put-together. It frames your face, so it’s more important that what your wearing.”

Kim DiPaola
ROIHS Sales Rep, gardening enthusiast, perfect hostess
“Jogging or going to the gym and running on the treadmill. I go for a short jog in the morning and I am like Superwoman.”

Prim Eisemann

Aveda Beauty Expert, Beach girl, true domestic goddess

"My diamond pendant from Tiffany's, Kai oil perfume, and a clean, organized home. I cannot survive, or imagine doing so happily, without these."

Brooke Bovo
ROIHS Principal, genious Corporate Facilitator, ROIHS “Team Mom”
“Wearing my favorite color, green, always makes me feel good. Also, the view out my back balcony gives me confidence. I stand there and think ‘whatever happens, this river will still flow, the ships will continue to pass by, the world will go on.”

And my top five confidence boosters {including the ones that helped me stay cool and calm in front of the camera}?

1. A soundtrack. Kanye West in the car, Coldplay at home on the weekends. Don’t underestimate the potency of a great soundtrack. In college, my best friend and roommate, Kristin, and I used to listen to the same song whenever we were getting ready to go out for the evening. It was our “going out” song, and to this day it reminds me to relax and enjoy life whenever I hear it. The other day, Kristin texted me the following words: “What was the name of that song? You know, that song we like?” I knew exactly the one.

2. A nice watch. Everyone needs a simple, good accessory that can polish off any given outfit. I find that the best, easiest one is a good watch. Skip gold and go for silver.

3. A decent haircut. I know, it feels a bit obvious to include this, but this is a seriously underrated possession. As you can see from my photo, above, I believe in working with what God gave you, in my case very curly hair, making a good cut and style of the utmost importance.

4. A signature scent—NEVER tell. Mine is a closely-guarded secret. {I’ll give you a hint—I’m not the first to be closed-lipped about this scent. Scent was so personal to it's creator that she wore it exclusively herself for years before decreeing that it be unveiled and released by her company upon her death.}

5. An important memento. When I managed my first design project on my own, Chrissy left me a note on a paint chip that said “Good luck Ash. You’ll do great!” It’s still on my bulletin board in my home office.

This week, give some thought to the things in your life that bring out the best in you.

Have a great, confident week!

Waterfront Creative Photography: http://waterfrontcreative.com/